Patience has its price

12:30 a.m.: "The coffee is comped because I had to wait."

Really? OK. I wasn't about to argue.

The woman had a cup carrier with three large glasses filled with ice, a 24-ounce coffee and a four-pack of donuts for a buck.

OK, I guess that'll be one dollar.

She proceeded to pay with three dimes, five nickels and 55 pennies, then apologized to the four sets of rolling eyes behind her. The set in front of her did not roll.

A touch of fear

4:10 a.m.: The first customer who actually made me jittery.

It was likely due to the fact that he couldn't stay still, like everything was imperative and he had a place to be RIGHT NOW! If I didn't move fast enough, he looked like he might explode.

I've never seen anyone that tweaked before.

He looked very ... unpredictable.

He had hard living written all over him: multiple tattoos, a dirty leather jacket, filthy jeans, missing teeth and a road map of wrinkles that confused his age.

There were no threats, no glares. I don't think he even said a word. He was vacant and kinetic at the same time.

I couldn't wait until he'd left.

Drive-off doofus

To  the guy who filled his tank, then drove off without paying: When we  say, "Go ahead on Pump 12," we also record your license plate number. 

Expect a man in blue to knock on your door soon.

Double gloves required

Discovered a used condom while policing the parking lot. Now THAT'S what I call desperate lovin'.